The Untimely Passing of Nancy Levin

 I’ve never lost anyone this close to me.  To lose a lifelong friend in such a sudden and tragic way leaves the people around them stunned into a stillness of disbelief and unrelenting grief.

And that is exactly what happened one week ago today.  I was sitting with my good friend Suzanne at McDonald’s of all places (that alone is a bad omen) having some morning coffee and discussing my move back down to LA.  It was the strangest twist of fate ever that we were actually together when we got that call.

Our friend Nancy was gone.

Nancy was like a big sister to me…actually, we kinda adopted each other. Her nickname for me since I was 17 years old was “Lil Sista” and she definitely had that role in my life.  Anything I did with my career, my life, I discussed with her.  She always made sure I was protected by an army of attorneys in a treacherous business, negotiated the deal for the car I still drive to this day, helped me find my house in Laurel Canyon– she was my sis.   And as a business person, role model and mentor, Nancy was truly brilliant.  She was a creative genius who was the mastermind behind an untold number of hit records during her time as a record executive and the wiz behind several successful companies during her career AFTER the record business.  Nancy of course, had the vision to get out (and I’m not kidding- there is a famous story about her literally walking out of her last record job in total disgust and frustration at what the biz was becoming when labels suddenly got bought by huge corporations) and moved into the online side of music a full decade before it was relevant to do so.  And made her indelible impact there, too.  Nancy was massively respected in her industry, by all of her coworkers and associates too, and was one of the funniest people I ever knew.  I still can’t believe I have to refer to her in past tense.

I will never forget the look on Suzanne’s face.  Two summers ago, Nancy had been in a horrible motorcycle accident.  Actually, it was a dirtbike. “Nance” lived on a sprawling, gorgeous, 40-acre ranch in Steamboat Springs Colorado.  She had burned nearly half the skin on her body when she hit the unpaved dirt road at forty miles an hour and slid against it. So, my first thought when seeing the look of utter confusion on Suzanne’s face was that she got into another terrible accident. 

Well, half of that was true…..she did get into another motorcycle accident.

Suzanne and I are both Buddhists. Every single day twice a day as part of our practice, we pray for the deceased. It is one of five key prayers you recite when you are chanting, the thought being, people who are gone cannot pray for themselves so you do it out of compassion for that condition.  When someone dies however,  you offer a special ceremony for them called a “Toba”.  So I knew exactly what it meant when Suzanne hung up the phone and said to me, “We have to do a Toba for Nancy.”

I’m sorry for the lagging posts.  That may continue for another week.  In addition to my relocation I’m also now planning a Memorial for my friend……..

What’s that saying about what doesn’t kill us makes us stronger?
What a cruel way to grow.